Some thoughts on FURIOSA, drowning in the stream, and Dario Argento's debut feature

Plus we're recommending a four-hour YouTube video about a failed Disney hotel

One of the best four-hour movies of the year so far is on YouTube.

I am not what I would describe as a Disney adult. I grew up in Florida, in large part, and spent a truly staggering amount of time at Walt Disney World starting in the ‘70s. I worked at the park, briefly, and I got introduced to the behind-the-scenes culture of the company just enough to know it was not for me. I’ve taken my kids to the California parks repeatedly over the years, but not since they were much younger, and I still haven’t been to Galaxy’s Edge or any of the recent Marvel additions to California Adventure. I’m sure I’d enjoy Rise of the Resistance or walking around the Baatu area to some degree, but the way Disney’s prices have skyrocketed has changed the way I view the experience overall. I can’t help but think about the price tag the entire time I’m at the park, and it wears on me in a way that pretty much saps all the fun from the experience.

When I saw the first news about Galactic Starcruiser, the so-called Star Wars hotel, I knew immediately that I would never see the inside of the building. It was just so obvious to me that it was going to be prohibitively expensive that I just filed it away in the “not for me” folder. When they finally announced the prices, I looked at them one time and got a cramp from laughing at the idea of spending somewhere around $8000 for a family vacation that lasts two days. I’m sure I’m telling you all about my income when I tell you that is an insane idea for my family. It’s not that $8000 is a fortune; it’s that I can think of so many other things that would be so much more satisfying and enriching and that would last longer than two days. And of course, when you’re talking about a Disney park or a Disney experience, you’re going to pay for every extra, and if you don’t opt for the extras, you’ll get a no-frills experience that is going to frustrate you more than entertain you.

I pretty much tuned the whole thing out at that point. I heard some vague grumbling when it opened but paid no attention. Same thing when it closed. I didn’t think about it beyond, “Oh, well, now I’m definitely not going to see it.” I doubt I would have thought about it again at all if not for the new Jenny Nicholson video on YouTube in which she details her entire experience, start to finish, in fairly exhaustive detail. I’ve watched earlier videos by her, but this might be her masterpiece so far. It is not just a review of a theme park experience that is closed now, but a laser-accurate dissection of the entire culture of Disney parks right now. What used to be an affordable family vacation, whether in California or Florida, has become a frenzied money grab that leaves the consumer feeling mugged. Sure, there are plenty of people still willing to pony up, and if anything, the a la carte way you can now enhance your experience financially has made some wealthy fans very happy, but it’s at the expense of the overall quality, and it has soured me deeply on the company. Modern Disney feels like it is constantly shoving you against the wall and searching your pockets, somehow entitled to every consumer dollar you have.

image courtesy of Jenny Nicholson

Nicholson spent the days after the release of her video at the Florida parks, enjoying the Avatar ride and documenting her experience even as Disney cultists around the world screamed at her for her obvious “hatred” of Disney. Considering she paid her own way to the Galactic Starcruiser in the first place, and that she’s one of the few people making videos about theme parks who isn’t accepting free things from the companies she’s talking about, Nicholson seems to me to be beyond reproach. She is making deeply personal and subjective videos, and you are free to disagree with them, but beyond that, she is a genuinely talented essayist. I often look at the running time of some of these YouTube videos and tap out before I even press play, but I know that Nicholson doesn’t waste your time as a viewer. She’s organized, she’s funny, and she’s very clear about what she’s trying to express in each of her pieces. I have written very little about YouTube over the years, and I have been guilty of a certain snobbery towards creators who work there. I’ve tried to engage more honestly and openly with it in recent years, though, because it’s obviously a hugely influential and widely-watched platform. Nicholson’s work showcases the best possibilities of YouTube, and it really wouldn’t work anywhere else. She’s not trying to make something you’d see somewhere else. She works on YouTube on purpose, and with great skill.

I have no opinion on the Star Wars hotel, as she accurately describes it, aside from knowing that the price tag made it a non-starter for me as a consumer. Even so, I found the video entertaining from start to finish, and I would encourage you to at least give it a try. The entire thing about YouTube is that it is personality-driven, and Nicholson’s got an original voice that makes even the most esoteric and niche topics feel approachable.

You can find her YouTube channel here.